South Park Conspiracy Theories

Isaac Hayes did not quit "South Park." My sources say that someone quit it for him.

I can tell you that Hayes is in no position to have quit anything. Contrary to news reports, the great writer, singer and musician suffered a stroke on Jan. 17. At the time it was said that he was hospitalized and suffering from exhaustion.

It’s also absolutely ridiculous to think that Hayes, who loved playing Chef on "South Park," would suddenly turn against the show because they were poking fun at Scientology.

Last November, when the “Trapped in a Closet” episode of the comedy aired, I saw Hayes and spent time with him in Memphis for the annual Blues Ball.

If he hated the show so much, I doubt he would have performed his trademark hit song from the show, “Chocolate Salty Balls.” He tossed the song into the middle of one of his less salacious hits and got the whole audience in the Memphis Pyramid to sing along.

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But it’s hard to know anything since Hayes, like Katie Holmes, is constantly monitored by a Scientologist representative most of the time. Luckily, at the Blues Ball he was on his own, partying just with family and friends. He was very excited about having gotten married and about the impending birth of a new child.


Is Anyone Really Surprised?

Is anyone out there really surprised that Microsoft has postponed Vista yet again? This is standard operating procedure for Microsoft. They're always delaying their new operating systems and when they finally arrive, they don't work, are full of bugs and have major security flaws. To top it all off they're always 5 years behind Apple anyway. Why don't people just buy a Mac already? Why buy a cheap imitation that doesn't work as well as the original? Apple computers may be a little bit more expensive up front, but you save so much money in the long run because you don't waste all that time patching your computer and updating virus software. And these days you can do everything and more on a Mac than you can on a Windows box.

America, What Are You Doing?

First you vote to re-elect George W. Bush and THEN you kick cute little Kevin Covais to the curb on American Idol and not Taylor, the grey-haired weirdo!?? Please boot Taylor!!! FREAKER!! He's such a bad lounge act, people. I can't bear to look at him. For some odd reason, I feel compelled to watch American Idol this season. I've never previously watched it much, except a few times to see my home girl Carmen Rasmusen a few seasons ago. My favorite this season is Katherine McPhee. That girl can sing. Chris Daughtry is quite good, too. And I think Bucky has quite a bit of star charisma. I can't imagine why he was in the bottom three this week. :P

South Park: Season Premiere or Season Dud?

I was disappointed by South Park's season premiere last night. I expected more. It's the season premiere, for one thing, so it should be really a big episode. And it was the return (and demise) of Chef...sort of. But it wasn't especially good. I was hoping they'd rip on Scientology and Tom Cruise what with their press release saying that Scientology had won that battle over the episode rerun last week, but that the million-year war for Earth had just begun. ;)
Alas, it was an okay episode. It could have been much better, though. C'est la vie.


The White House is Not a Frat House, Mr. President

I was driving to work yesterday morning listening to NPR (National Public Radio) on KCPW as I do every morning when they tuned in LIVE to the press conference with Pres. George W. Bush.
I was so proud of Helen Thomas who posed the question, "I'd like to ask you, Mr. President, your decision to invade Iraq has caused the deaths of thousands of Americans and Iraqis, wounded Americans and Iraqis for a lifetime. Every reason given, publicly at least, has turned out not to be true. My question is, Why did you really want to go to war? From the moment you stepped into the White House, your Cabinet officers, former Cabinet officers, intelligence people and so forth .. but what's your real reason? You have said it wasn’t oil, the quest for oil; it hasn't been Israel or anything else. What was it?" WOW! Way to go Helen!
But then Bush gave the typical politician's answer where you talk around the question, but never answer it, of course.
The thing that was most annoying and creepy was how he kept laughing throughout his answer and while answering other questions. He was talking about soldiers, Americans dying and LAUGHING!
I so wanted to be there, to be Helen Thomas or some other reporter with the moxie to stand up to the President and chastize him. I'd say, "Mr. President, this is not a frat house. We're not your fraternity buddies. This is not a joke. Thousands of people are dying because of your little prank."
I don't mean to disparage fraternities, so if you're in one don't get upset. I was in one in college, too. My point is, Bush was infamously a frat party boy and he still acts like one. It's disgusting.